Port Arthur, Tex
June 21, 1923
My Dearest Florence;
Today I received your letter and it was just as expected. A Bawling out. Not exactly that, either, but just a little different from the previous ones. When your letter came yesterday and you said you had a good lecture for me coming I knew I would get it today. So I did. I was just thrilled when I saw that big fat letter there, then after I read it, I did not feel as good afterward as I had expected to. It just made me think lots, worry a little and think deeply of you Florence. I don’t feel in the letter writing mood tonite, that is I don’t believe I can make things sound good with the scant vocabulary that I have at hand. You know sometimes a person can sit down and write just the nicest things (this refers to you) and then a person can sit down and try to write but the words don’t flow to meet the needs of the thoughts. (this refers to me)
As yet I am a man in size but a child’s head is on my shoulders as some people see it. But Florence my Dear I see lots of things that I do not say anything about. I am dumb in some respects, I admit, but I think I can rate as much as the average. This is a petty thing and I don’t think we ought to say anything about such little affairs. But Florence my Dear I can tell by your letters each time when the words come from your heart. I can tell when you have to force yourself to write at times when you would like to do something better, but my Florence knows she must write because Fred is expecting it and thinking of her much. I can tell when you have frivolous ideas in your head and when you have been out enjoying yourself. But let me tell you these things have happened very very few times because your letters have been the dearest things and I simply adore you for the way you have written. Many times those sweet letters of yours have cheered me to the utmost and have driven the blues far far away. It is the kind things and the dear things that you say that makes me feel so happy when I read those most adorable letters. How can I help but like you for it.
But Florence this last letter has been much sarcasism [sarcasm] throughout. It’s not like you at all. There is something wrong somewhere. Let’s get it straight. Probably I wrote things that made you feel wrong. I did not mean to tho’ Florence. I think you must have been off at some place having the time of your life, you came home rushed madly and read the letters and I think saw things the wrong way from which I meant them. First if you don’t mind I will point out a few sarcastic remarks. But before I do, I do not mean to send back sarcasm, because I will not fuss at anyone.
“You poor little overgrown baby!!!”
Maybe I am, eh?
No I won’t talk back as I thought I would. I like you too well. I can’t do it, I must control myself. I can’t say things because you would misunderstand and it would make things worse. But Florence my dear I am Jealous. Maybe not Jealous either, but you speak of Lewis being over so much. You said he was over every nite last week except Monday nite. This is too much for me to stand. I realize you like it heaps, but Florence that is more then I can stand. I think the world of you and you have simply been dear to me. But I were in Houston I don’t think I would come every nite. Don’t you think that is rather often. Don’t you have any feeling for me at all. I suppose some of our friends can see things. I think we are very good friends and that is a little bit thick I think. Florence my dear I sure feel bad. I wish I could see you. I can’t explain things writing. “Monday nite of last week was the only night he didn’t come over.” Florence that’s a lot to take. He my be full of life, act like a monkey and be more attractive, but can’t you treat me right. When you are turned loose don’t go wild over your good times. You will soon get to the point where you cannot appreciate the anymore. I can’t realize what has happened. I know that you haven’t forgotten me, but I feel very bad. “Poor little overgrown baby!!” feels so bad.
No I don’t want you to sit and wonder as I do, I am glad that Lewis is your precious friend and that he can show you a good time. It’s very good of him, but I can’t feature the occasion so often and so quickly. Don’t you realize I am coming back some day, then you won’t disappoint me. I cannot spend as much time with my social affairs as I would like to. I have a desire to get an education and make a success and I am going to do it, regardless of what comes up. Some day Florence you will be proud to say that you know me so well. I hope you do at least, but someday I am going to be on top, even though I am at the bottom at present. There are somethings about social affairs that I do now know and lots of things about other affairs that I do not know, but I am learning.
I can’t understand the attitude you take toward going to Rice. Some people who have no chance to go to school are those that are desirous of an education. Others have chances but never realize the value until it is too late. I can’t understand a girl like you not wanting an education. It is more valuable then these frivolous good times. They come and are gone, but you can sure appreciate an education in the future. But the good thing about it is that you can have a better time going to school then not. It’s the class of people that you come in contact with. This is all foolishness to you and you will probably think I am foolish for saying it, but admit my dear, it is sense.
Florence Dearest I just can’t get you off my mind. I think of you so much. It’s like candy to a baby to have you on my mind. It make me feel good, it puts refreshing life into me. It just has an effect on me that words can’t explain. I think of all those good times and the good times we’ll have when I return to see you. Our friendship is one thing that will stand. My heart would be butchered if it should not. If there is anything is this letter that you don’t understand, don’t take it the wrong way because everything is to try to make you feel good and bind our correspondence. My heart just melts when I think how dear you have been to me. It’s been wonderful since that day. So many good times. Really you have had lots more to do with the good times then me. It has been you who has done so much. Just as I said to you before, you to my life has been a dream of paradise. Sometimes I don’t feel exactly right, and may have said things that I did not intend to, in letters and talking, but you will excuse me, won’t you. Florence my Dear, in fact, I think both of us have done the same. So Florence sit down and think of me real hard and write me a long letter. I am craving one from my Dear in Houston.
You can’t imagine how I would appreciate it. Of course you do.
Say when are you coming down here. I just can’t wait till then. You know one month from now I will be on 7 to 3 shift and everthing will be pretty. but two weeks from now I will work from 11 pm to 7 am and then I can be with you any time from 3 pm to 10:30 pm any day. All day Sundays. Come on down ole Dear we can have a good time. Who are you going to visit here? Maybe some of these boys know them.
Florence my Dear I must close this short epistle. I will meet you in Dreamland.
Lots and loads of Love
Fred.
The monkey is coming for you
